03 – Mephisto

When Hal woke up, it was already 9 am of Saturday morning. He felt energetic and revived. He got a good night’s sleep. Everything seemed perfect. But as his mind recovered from waking up, Hal slowly remembered why he wanted to go back to bed. Today was reality. And reality didn’t hold much for him. Hal looked at the clock. 9 am seemed too early. What was he going to do the rest of the day?

Hal willed himself to get up from bed to do his usual routine. No one in his household need ever know of his dilemma. It was his own problem, something that he didn’t want to share. And perhaps the best way to do this was to act normally.

He brushed his teeth with mechanical efficiency. The cold water from the shower didn’t startle Hal. And when it came to breakfast, Hal ate it with as much passion as he brushed his teeth. He wasn’t particularly hungry, but since the food was there, he might as well get it over with.

Hal’s dad wasn’t at home. He was still at work, making sure that everything was running smoothly and that nothing would go wrong over the Christmas season. Hal was sure of that fact. So it really came as a surprise to him that when he was lying on his bed, staring at the ceiling, that his father came in.

“Hello. Is something bothering you?” His dad asked.

“Dad?! Aren’t you supposed to be at work?”

“Even a person like me has the right to go home once in awhile. Anyway, work was several hours ago. The maids have already prepared your lunch and they said that you haven’t touched it for the past two hours.”

Hal immediately looked at the clock and saw that it was already 2 pm. He had been doing nothing for the past four hours except stare at the ceiling. He did try to sleep but his dreams were constantly filled with images of Amanda. Hal dreaded his sleep as much as he did killing himself.

“I wasn’t hungry.” Hal replied.

“That’s strange. So, it’s finally Christmas break. Are you and your friends going out anywhere before Christmas?”

Hal merely shrugged. There was only one person he wanted to be with during Christmas, and Hal doubted it if she’d oblige. Everyone else, including his father, seemed peripheral.

“Well, suit yourself. Anyway, if you need anything or want someone to talk to, you know that you can always come to me. I’m concerned about you.” Hal’s father waited for a response from Hal before leaving the room. Seeing that Hal didn’t even twitch at his statement, he gave a sigh and left.

“Need anything? I need her! Yet you won’t be able to give me that. No one can. Someone to talk to? Why would I talk to you? You were never there when I needed you. All you have is this false sense of being a responsible father, and so you give the occasional statement showing care and concern when in fact you’re busy with something else. And even then, I would never talk to you about relationships! If you were a good husband, mom would still be here! My problem is my own and it’s none of your business.” But Hal’s reply came too late, it was said a few minutes after his father left. There was no one to hear it but himself, a statement he wanted to say to bring down his father’s pride. He thought of going to his father and saying at his face, but Hal suddenly felt tired, and lost his fury. It wouldn’t be as effective anymore. And so he gave up, resigning himself to his fate.

***

The phone rang that evening, but no one was answering it. On the fifth ring, it occurred to Hal that it might be Amanda who was calling. He suddenly wished that their phone had caller ID, so that there would be less surprises in his life. It was a faint hope for Hal, and so he scrambled for the phone and answered it.

“A-ma- hello?”

“Hello. May I please speak with Hal?”

“This is Hal speaking. May I know who this is?”

“Oh Hal, it’s me, Sandy. How are you? Merry Christmas!”

“Um, thanks. Is that all?”

“Well, the reason I called is to invite you. There’s going to be a party tomorrow evening. It’s an acquaintance party between your class and my class. It’s going to be held at my house and I’m in charge of organizing the event. Will you be able to make it?”

“I’m not sure. I have lots of things to do.”

“During Christmas break?”

“Yeah. Not everyone is as privileged as you Sandy.”

“Well, in case you change your mind, here’s my address.”

Hal didn’t even know why he bothered to actually jot down the address. He didn’t have anything planned for tomorrow, but he didn’t want to see people either. Hal wanted to be alone and gone from this world. Sandy’s call only made him remember that Sandy was Amanda’s best friend, and Amanda didn’t care about him. She cared about Philip. Philip would most likely be at the party. And with him there, Amanda.

Hal wanted to slap himself. Suddenly, he was tempted to go to the party. But at the same time, he feared it because of what he might see. Getting rejected was one thing. Seeing Amanda and Philip together was another thing. Yet as much as he dreaded seeing them as a couple, Hal didn’t think he could go on without seeing Amanda one last time. This might be his only chance to see her, and perhaps, by being there, show her that she shouldn’t have declined his offer to take her to the prom.

“I don’t know what to do.” Hal told himself. But that was a lie. In his heart, he was already resolved to go to the party. He wanted, no, he needed to see Amanda. It was perfectly reasonable that he’d get rejected again. But that didn’t matter. He was already suffering anyway. All that mattered was one person; all that mattered was Amanda.

***

The party started late in the evening, at around 9 pm. Hal was wearing long sleeves and a tie, although most of his other classmates were in less formal attire. A few girls did seem interested in him, but he merely smiled at them and found a way to cut the conversation short. Sure, some of the girls that talked to him were pretty, but Hal was obsessed with only one person.

And she wasn’t here.

Hal saw a lot of their hostess, Sandy, though. She was grating on his nerves. Perhaps Sandy knew that Amanda would never come to this party and baited Hal to attend this event knowing that. He couldn’t help but feel suspicious when it came to Sandy.

Philip made an appearance, and he was constantly surrounded by girls from the other class. He talked to them and made jokes, laughing a lot and causing the others to laugh as well. Hal couldn’t understand it. Why was Philip getting all the attention? Or more importantly, he already had the affection of several girls; why did he have to take his Amanda?

Tired at waiting for someone who may never show up, Hal took a seat and sat down.

“So what’s bothering you?” Hal heard a voice ask him. It was the voice of one of his classmates, Johann.

Hal turned to face Johann and tried to hide his discomfort. “What makes you think something’s bothering me?”

“Hal, Hal, Hal. You should know me better than that. I’m the news editor of the school paper. I sense these things. You have an interesting story to tell. Besides, you’re the guy who makes the class laugh, the practical joker, the guy with all the wisecracks. And let’s face it, you haven’t been cheery for the past week, and you haven’t insulted anyone today. I’d say that’s a record for you.”

“So you’re saying that you got me all figured out, huh? That if I’m not making wisecracks, then something must be wrong with me? At least I have a life, four-eyes. I don’t go bothering other people, telling them that I think something is wrong with them.”

Johann tried to suppress a smile. Hal couldn’t figure out why he was enjoying this. Was it something he said?

“I never turn down the attention of girls. But for the past few hours, you’ve been doing just that. Now normally, a guy would be happy at the attention he’s getting from the opposite sex. I find it strange that you’re rebuffing them, especially considering this is an acquaintance party. The point of the event is to meet girls. Unless, of course, you’re gay.” Johann smiled when he said the last few words.

“Me? Gay?” Hal laughed before he resumed his reply. “If you only knew how much I’ve been torturing myself over a particular girl.”

“So what happened?”

“Why should I tell you?”

“Do you have anything better to do? And from the looks of things, whoever it is you’re waiting for, she’s not coming. You’ve been dumped, whether you like it or not.”

“I wasn’t dumped. She was never mine to begin with. We’re just friends.” Hal’s voice faltered as he said those last words.

“Is it someone I know?”

“Do you know Amanda? Amanda Lopez from the same class we’re having an interaction with.”

“The tomboy, right? You fell in love with her?” Now it was time for Johann to laugh.

“She’s not a tomboy! She’s just… different. Anyway, I was hoping to ask her out to the prom.”

“And let me guess, Philip beat you to it?”

“Actually, no. I asked her the day before. But she declined. I don’t know why. I thought she had something important to do. But it seems that she agreed to be Philip’s date.”

“You and Philip aren’t that close, huh?”

“Not really. Why?”

“You could have told him how you felt about Amanda. I’m sure he wouldn’t have asked her out if he knew.”

“Would you have done so?”

“Jesus, we’re a class, Hal. We’ve been through hell for the past four years. Sure, I might not like each and everyone of our classmates, but that doesn’t mean I don’t care about them. You can trust us. I don’t expect you to trust our teachers, and especially not our parents. I mean they’re the reason in the first place why we go to school. But us, your classmates, we undergo the same torment as you do. That’s why when we cheat, we cheat as a class. We watch out for each other. You don’t see me blathering to the faculty who was cheating in the exam and who wasn’t, even if I’m the news editor. If we don’t take care of each other, no one will.”

“That’s a great what-if, Johann. But even then, that’s no guarantee that Amanda would have been my date for the prom.”

“No, it’s not. But at least no one from your class would be asking her out. Doesn’t that count for something?”

“I guess so. But it’s too late now.”

“Let me ask you this. Did you do your best to win her heart?”

“Of course I did.”

“Then that shouldn’t make you regret things. You did the best that you could. If she declined your offer, it’s her loss. You did all that you could.”

“Logically, that makes sense. But it doesn’t hurt any less.”

“I think there’s liquor in the bar over there.”

“I don’t drink. My dad used to drink. And drinking won’t make my problems disappear.”

“Then drink not for your dad, not for the loss of your crush, but drink for the sake of friendship. We’re here for you. I’m not telling you to drown your sorrows in alcohol. But you can find happiness with the camaraderie of friends.”

Hal smiled. At least someone was being kind to him that day. It didn’t ease the pain. Hal didn’t think anything could. But misery loves company, and it was better suffering with other people than agonizing over it alone.

***

When Hal got home, he was exhausted. Amanda never showed up, and he never got to talk about his problems with anyone aside from Johann. Talking to four-eyes was strangely comforting, even if it resolved nothing. The evening was a total disaster, but he didn’t have anything to lose anyway.

Hal closed his eyes and allowed the darkness to consume him. He then had a vision of a cool, barren land filled with nothing but dust and skeletons. Hal looked around and saw no one. He didn’t mind. Being alone didn’t appear so horrible. After losing the one person that mattered, everything else seemed to pale in comparison.

From a distance, the nine-headed dragon loomed. Hal didn’t care. He was actually eager to meet it. If death arose from the encounter, then so be it. Hal didn’t have anything to lose. He waited patiently for the creature to arrive. When it did, someone was standing on one of the heads. It was human and took the face of Johann. Hal didn’t know whether to laugh at the absurdity of seeing a nerd with glasses standing on top of a mighty dragon, or to cower in fear.

The dragon lowered one of its necks so that Hal found himself facing Johann. He was smiling, and had the most bizarre grin on his face.

“Hal.” Johann said. The voice was booming, and lacked the affection he was used to hearing from his phantom Amanda.

“Johann?” Hal asked.

Johann laughed and shook his head.

“What do you want?”

Johann gave Hal the biggest grin he could muster. “Ah, it’s not what you can give me, but more of what I can give you.”

“What do you mean? Who are you?”

“Isn’t it obvious? I’m the devil.”

Word Count: 2,340
Total Word Count: 6,572